As I strolled down the winding alleys of Seoul like a princess through an enchanted castle, munching on a pack of excruciatingly expensive sweet potato crisps, I couldn’t help but […]
I found this photograph while surfing the internet today. It hit me hard and fast.
I have always felt imprisoned, I had realized that the source of my frustrations spawn from me and me alone, yet I have never realized, in one succinct sentence, just what trapped me.
It makes sense.
I believe I am destined for greatness, and thus each day I spend bored, unaccomplished, and watching the hours tick away I die a little more inside. At the same time, I don’t try as hard as I can or should. I rely excessively on faith, on the vague belief that I will accomplish something one day, that I will not fail.
Thus I am trapped by the hope of escape, and merely hoping. I am trapped by a wish that overwhelms me so much that it has caused me to do nothing but wish.
AI believe help will come one day. I keep waiting for miracles
People who know me well know I am prone to existential crises. “Hi, how’s your day?” “Fine, I’m having trouble figuring out the significance of my existence in this universe […]
“You can weave your life so long––only so long, and then a thing in the world out of your control will tug at one vital thread and leave you patternless and subdued.”
Patricia A. McKillip, The Forgotten Beasts of Eld
What a marvelous novel, I could not put it down at all. I have been away from the joy of reading for far too long, like a child strayed from her home, mind numbed by a world with a painted face, a clown whose heart, beneath a myriad of colors and tricks, lies as hollow and ordinary as a rubber ball.
Okay, maybe I’ve been reading too many fantasy novels.